A Day In The Life Of A Spinner

Many many moons ago I sold booze for a living.

Now I know you’re thinking that makes perfect sense as I can be, at times, a booze hound. But let me tell you kids, at some point I was a professional booze hound.

I was 22 when I started representing many fine products including Jack Daniels, Stoli, and Jager to name a few.

And my nickname at work was “Spinner.”

I never really understood what it meant. But all the guys in the office (read: middle aged drunks) seemed to really like having me around and were always taking me to lunch, and to meet their clients, and inviting me to restaurant openings and special events.

It was a very esteemed life being a spinner.

I never thought much about the nickname–especially after I stopped working there and moved on to bigger and brighter things.

Last year, about this time, I had drinks with some of my old professional drinking buddies and one of them explained to me why it was, exactly, that I’d been dubbed such a name and place of honor within the company.

A spinner, it seems, is a woman who is small enough in stature that while having sex with her, you can effectively spin her around like a top.

Urban Dictionary will back me up on this.

Over the weekend I went to a birthday celebration for a coworker (dubbed “Nuzzle” due to her plentiful breasts) where I hung out with all of those former male co-working admirers. And someone called me Spinner.

And I blushed a little.

Turns out, I was informed, I was also voted “Best Rack” in the office.

Quite the combination, fellas.

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