You Say "Tomato", I Say "Cheater"

My friend B.P. is quite the traveler. She’s been gone from the Queen City of the plains for almost a month now. Midwest, Big City, Sin City, whirlwind adventures. Sigh. Quite the jet-setting life of an early 30-something.  And, she’s also one of my best “researchers”, as she too is sassy, classy, single and a freak-magnet (oh the joy).  According to an email she sent me, the Midwest has been very kind to give us lots of material:

“While in [insert-Midwestern-town-here], I took the time to visit my cousin…He is married and has 2 kids under the age of 2. It’s probably been 5 years since I’ve been able to catch up with him. All was good with my visit to see him…Anyway, after we all had dinner and chatted – his wife, kids, and mom and dad went to bed. So my cousin and I stayed up to chat. Not even 15 minutes into the conversation he informed that he is a “swinger” AND not with his wife. And he has slept with many women since they married about 8 years ago. And he does not have safe sex. It doesn’t seem to phase him. He even finds people to sleep with on Craig’s List. His wife has no idea. This is a family that I thought would march me straight to church with my visit uh but no I do believe it is my cousin that might need to visit church. I guess what he told me was the last thing I thought I would hear from him.

Then, the next day I head into the city to meet up with my friend. An old boyfriend from college that last I knew he was engaged and living with his fiance. He was about a half hour late meeting me and tells me he will tell me why once we sit down and eat dinner. So flash forward to dinner – he tells me he was late because he was making out in the parking lot with a woman he also once dated in college – except she is married now – and he is considering starting an affair with her.

Seriously for once in my life this drama was NOT mine!!!

It just makes me think of the ….other bad habits part of your website. That’s all I’m saying.”

And I soooo love her for that! Thinking of me and my other bad habits while traversing the agriculture belt makes me a bit weepy. It also makes me a bit sad for the women of the Midwest who are married to such morons. “Swinging” as she called it, isn’t actually swinging if your wife doesn’t know about it. That’s called “cheating”.  B.P., give me your cousin’s address and I’ll send him a dictionary with the two definitions highlighted in case he has any questions. As for the rest of it, see my notes below:

“My question Leah – WTF is happening in this world? I am on a quest to decide if marriage is the right thing for me – and ALL of these examples are not really giving marriage a good case.”

All of these examples are proof positive for why you shouldn’t marry a scumbucket. Don’t get married just to be married. Get married to someone you want to be married to. And check and see that he wants to be married to you.  Because marriage is not a euphamism for bad behavior. That’s what being single is for.

So with that said, you could also stay single forever and do as many bad things as you like with other bad-idea-minded single people.

The choice is yours.

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